"You can go on over and ask for some sugar"

Reflections on Community & Belonging

By: Jocelyn Birkes

Community is a strength, I think there’s a lot to learn and a lot to enjoy. I discovered the importance of community and learning when I was working in the Brantford area. I worked around belonging and did a lot of core gift training and I think that really helped me connect more. Enjoying the relationship and rapport building with people really brought life to me, and I think it helps bring a lot more life to people as they experience belonging for themselves.

Belonging is important to be because it gives me a sense of joy. I mean, it’s quite joyful most of the time, but what I like about belonging is how you can go into a place, and someone knows your name and you know their name. Helping people feel welcomed in a space is the important part. I always try to pay attention to people who may be on the outside or may not feel like they’re there yet. They’re trying to make sure that we have that safe space for people to come and enjoy.

Being yourself is really, really important, and I think it’s hard in society. It’s really about just trying to be the real you and presenting the real you to others, allowing them to be themselves. It’s kind of like working together to create that better experience for everyone. Just come as you are, you know? There’s a joy that spreads from one person to another. And I think we could use a braver and more invitational society.

I share what I learn and what I love. And I love community and going out and doing things. I’d like to bring people together, like do a BBQ or something. Then at least you know who’s in your neighbourhood. They know you. If you needed some sugar and don’t have any, you can go over and ask for some sugar.

I think sometimes because of the business of our lives and how we work really hard for other people, for our families and for ourselves in some ways, sometimes giving that free time, giving your time away to go get out in the community to do something fun or random is important. Even if it’s only for half an hour. Try something new. Go try crocheting or a new sport or go hang out with someone. Go for coffee or see a poetry club or do something fun and random and invite someone else to come with you. Don’t be afraid to talk to a stranger. Don’t be afraid to smile at someone. It’s such a good feeling when you can feel and reciprocate the energy that someone’s giving and don’t be afraid to speak up and be you.

The best possible thing is that everyone has experiences that bring joy and belonging.

Belonging as a colour would be red because it’s my favorite colour and it’s bold and bright and exciting. There’s also the rainbow, which is not just one colour but multi-coloured, and represents diversity and the beautiful things in our world.

 Story developed by Steven Barrow

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This is part of a series of stories on Belonging.

Do you have a story or thoughts to share about belonging? We would love to connect. You can share that story or leave your contact info in the form and we can document your story for you. https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/BelongingStories

• Belonging Project